Come on .. sing it with me "I'm crazy....crazy for feeling this way.."

The kids have me on the ropes again today. I'd blame it on the monthly, but that's such a tired, overused, crude, oh what the heck "my cousin's visiting". What's a girl to do but grouch at the kids and scavenge at the back of the pantry looking for forgotten half-used bags of chocolate chips? And I may have mentioned at least once that I'm not good at letting the kids have their way with "activities". My niece is here visiting and usually adding one more to the pack is a nice distraction, however, it turns out, there are a couple of exceptions to the rule. a) You cannot add another boss to an organazation that is management heavy b) You have to add a new member who is equal to the pack in their ability to stick with a task. It is only day two and I'm running out of things to entertain with really fast.

We've done cookie making, she said with a shiver up her spine. I walk in the kitchen to find the twelve year old hunched over a puddle of sugar cookie dough that is spilling over the edge of my plastic cutting board, cutting shapes anywhere from an inch and a half thick to tissue paper thick, with the other half of the dough stuck to the rolling pin. "The dough keeps sticking to the rolling pin, mom." he says. "Well first, you need some flour and you shouldn't be cutting that on that plastic cutting board it's gonna stick to that too. And look at that dough! You need to put it in the freezer for a couple of minutes it's too warm. Your never gonna be able to...." blank stares "um.. it's fine .. it's good .. here, take the flour and dust it around and put some on the rolingpinandtrynotTOGETITEVERYWHERE!" and I rushed out the room as fast as I could and didn't go back till they were done.

We have the pool right down the street and despite the fact that it has rained, there have been big chunks of time that the pool has been open. The boys go down everyday and spend at least three hours playing. It doesn't matter whether their friends are there or the place is deserted, they always have a great time. So Tuesday, all three get their swimsuits on, sunscreen, snacks, the whole nine yards. They jump on their scooters and I'm thinking, "YES!" a little quiet time. I'll finish the dishes and the laundry and maybe I'll sit for a minute. Thirty minutes later she and Melee' walk back in the door. "What's up?" I asked. "They were playing a game I didn't want to play and so we came home." "What about playing something else?" "No, I don't want to go to the pool right now." Melee' heads back to the pool and ten minutes later she says "Where's my Dad?" "He and Uncle Charlie went to the pool about fifteen minutes ago." "Oh, O.K, I'm going back to the pool now." "O.K." I'm thinking this is going to be a very long week.

Don't get me wrong, she's helpful and polite and she comes up to me out of nowhere and says "Is there something I can clean?" I really didn't know what to say to that at first, and then I came to my senses and put her to work. But I can't let her clean the house all day and then when I ask my boys to pick up something they yell "WHAT? I didn't do THAT! WHY DO I HAVE TO PICK IT UP?"

My Dad called as I was trying to make them a pan of smores bars. "No, I don't need any help ya'll go in the other room and I'll let you know when they're done." But they didn't go. I talked to my Dad as I melted marshmallows and chocolate chips and every couple of minutes one of them would ask "Can I stir that?" I'd shake my head and mouth *no* flap my hand in their direction and mouth *go on .. go in the other room .. I'm on the phone* more flapping and pointing at the reciever as I measured out eight cups of cereal. "Are you gonna put extra marshmallows in that?" "Well, how's grandmommy doing? Uh-huh. Yeah." *SHOO! GO ON* FLAP-FLAP "OUT!" "Oh, nothing Daddy, talkin to the kids." *OUT!* Pointing my finger into the other room with my hand on the hip for extra emphasis. And they just stood there leaned over the counter breathing on my melting chocolate chips "Spreaken de Duetsch?" Firm in their knowledge I wouldn't swat them with a wooden spoon that had chocolate on it.

I told them what to pick up, I told them how to pick it up, I gave directions, I suggested ideas, I explained things, I joked, I cajoled, I yelled and I pleaded. By eight o'clock last night I needed a margarita AND a shot of Botox right between the eyes. I couldn't even talk. I had completely run out of words. Peach NEVER uses her daily allotment of words but I had exhausted my entire supply and borrowed out of today's stash. I put the three older kids to bed at nine and told them they could talk quietly for a little while. I came back downstairs and quietly stalked around the house looking for something to take it out on, but I don't have a dog. I steered clear of Charlie so as not to use anymore words out of the next days savings. Everytime I stalked near him he'd ask "Whatcha doing?" "Nothing." I grumbled and moved on to an empty room. "Everything O.K.?" he ventured. "Yep. Just grouchy." over and out. I had to make him go into the kids rooms at eleven to tell them to SHuuuuuusSSSSSHHH! because I had been in three times prior to, and knew that I'd explode like a crazy bomb if I had to do it.

Charlie just called and said "Are you in a better humor today?"

Big pause ....

"Yes. I'm gonna say yes, because I'm a positive thinker, that's why."