Gag Me with a Spoon

My brother called me tonight and relayed the saga of his nine year old's healing of the tonsilectomy. He said Saturday night she started screaming from the bathroom and when he got in the bathroom, he said it looked like someone had slit her throat. He said her entire face and shirt were covered in blood, there was blood all over the bathroom and she was hysterically crying and saying she was bleeding to death. Of course the doctor's had said that there would be some bleeding when the scabs (echhh) came off, etc. etc... but he said he was totally freaked out and she was terrified-freaked out, and it looked like she had thrown up a large part of her liver. (EEEWW, aren't you glad you tuned in?) So they gathered her up and rushed her to the emergency room. Long story short, as soon as she got a bed in the ER she went to sleep like she'd never slept before. She had hardly eaten a thing all week and the scabs and the blah, blah....Girl was wiped OUT! Had a little snooze, two hours of faunt-la-raunt in the Emergency room and they sent her home recovering as per outlined. Of course she's having a drainage issue, which upsets her stomach, which further led us to the following philosophical discussion....

"Dude, can you hock a lugie?"

"No."

"Like, when you cough, and that stuff comes up in the back of your throat you just swallow it?"

"Yea."

"That affirmative was way too fast."

"Well, in my old age, if it comes almost entirely up, then yes I'll spit it into a Kleenex. But if I'm gonna have to work at gettin it up....no."

"WHAT?"

"I'd throw up!"

"That's what Annie said, 'I can't do that, I'd vomit!'"

"Well it's true, it's a girly thing."

"Dude."



I'm thinkin' that whole eye-drop thing is lookin' pretty good.