Oh HGTV, how I miss you. I miss Candice Olson and her fabulous drapes. I miss the organizational shows where I get to meet people who have houses more cluttered than mine. I miss Designing for the Sexes where men and women agree to let a totally gay man resolve their difference of opinions over the leather recliner and big screen T.V.
I was So looking forward to a summer of Rabbit Ear free T.V. It all began with the TCA cable debaucle. We wanted to downgrade service and all of a sudden, they can't seem to get to the cable box. Turns out it's in my neighbors backyard see, and they've got a big dog. So now they want ME to ask my neighbor, what would be a convenient time for the cableman to come into their backyard. Can you just imagine the steam coming out of my husband's ears? Can you imagine three months later him throwing the cable bill down and saying, "That's it, we're not paying the bill." Can you imagine my panic as I try to broker a compromise, because what am I gonna do without Blue's Clues?
The cable got disconnected, I've been letting him cool off for about 6 months now. And with football season on the horizon, we started shopping Satelite Dish companies.
They were coming today. I had an appointment. I was THIS close. The men came out and couldn't find one clear view of the sky from anywhere on our property. (*Sob*) They left me with no hope. Don't get me wrong, I can get ABC on both T.V.'s, I can get CBS but it's really fuzzy. But you've got to be jones-ing REALLY bad to try to watch NBC. And Fox, fogetaboutit. Charlie says he guesses I can have cable. (With an implied "If I really want it.") Of course I really want it. But maybe if I wait till Football season, he'll want it first.
3 comments:
Okay, now, don't you love Big Brother? I think it's you, right? And that's on CBS. And it starts June 21st. I just seen the commerical! So you gotta do something so we can talk about Big Brother, kay??
Hold out! No, cut down some trees! No, put out a contract on the neighbors dog...that's it! Or, you can catch up on your reading!!!
p.s. And what is "jonesing"? This Yankee is clueless.
jonesing v 1. to vomit. 2. to be on crank. Submitted by Michael David, Los Angeles, CA, USA, 12-14-1996. 3. to feel withdrawal symptoms, especially from a drug. ("He was jonesing for a smoke.") Submitted by Doug, Ohio, USA, 04-06-1997. 4. to crave something, not necessarily a drug. ("Man, I'm jonesing for a kiss!") vomit under the influence of drugs withdrawal crave
O.K., I'm not sure why I knew "jonesing" meant having withdrawals, but I promise I'm not a druggie. Must have seen it on a T.V. show. :)
And I'm thinking I could definitely slip that dog a frisky weinie over the fence!
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