My Musical Peeps

My kids are quite musical, they get it from Charlie's side of the family.

Melee' can play Journey's Faithfully on the piano. Never had ONE lesson!

John of course is our resident Viola player, whose speci-ality is learning and playing things by ear, which drives me crazy, cuz when it comes time to play the super simple pieces he's assigned by his teacher, he rarely gets it right unless teacher plays it for him first.

But it doesn't stop there, Oh NO!

Ace likes to express himself musically as well...when you make him happy he responds..

eg. "Momma, can I have some chockit meeeaaalk?"
"Sure."
"Dahn-dahn che! Dahn-dahn che! Dahn-dahn che!"

and if it's really special he responds with Smoke on the Water...

eg. "Can we watch Yightening Da-Queen?"
"Sure."
"Dah-dah-daah, dah-dah DAAH dah, dah-dah-daah, DAHN DAHN!"

And Peach made up this little ditty this morning...
"AAAH-ohhh, just shut the door, AAAHH-ooohhh just shut the door."
And she can tell me which lady sings which part. A little musical theatre perhaps.

It's a hard life for those of us who are musically impaired.

It is my GREATEST Wish...

But can a person be Fergilicious while enjoying a diet rich in Ice Cream products?

I write the Songs that make the Whole World Sing...

Can anyone give me some advice on a five year old and a three year old who think they own songs, and by virtue of their ownership can say who can and cannot sing them?

They just had a knock-down drag-out over which one of them was the true owner and therefore singer of the theme song for "Little Einsteins". It started with her singing the ditty at the top of her lungs as she can outsing him, due to her opera-like range, at which point he had to resort to picking up the heaviest object he could find and hurling it at her.

Is it possible to make up a rule about this? I thought I was already reaching new heights of ridiculousness when I started having to keep track of whose turn it was to use the remote control to open and close the garage door. (And yes that includes the ten and twelve year old.)

Oh and the newest rule of the day...from Peach,
"Ace, we never put the little potty on our heads. It gets stuck and it's really for babies to learn how to use the big potty."

I know. It's a little out there, but evidently, necessary.

Thanksgiving Day with the In-laws...

Could this be the reason that I'm dead-ass last in the Bragging Rights football league? While it would be a major contributor, I suppose you do need to watch some football to know about some football, it doesn't explain the reason I'm the only person in double-digits in the loss column. I'm gonna blame the whole thing on Ben Roethlisberger and Mike Vanderjagt, I finally gave up on Ben and cut him and now he's scoring points for my neice while I sit with back-up quarterbacks and hoping the first-stringers get taken out at the knees. It's not a fun way to root for a team. And even though I thought I had a pretty good defense, Philadelphia netted me NEGATIVE POINTS this week. Edgerrin James too. Charlie has moved from last place position up four places, leaving me in the dirt. Cry Babies was an appropriate choice for my team name.

Some Final Thoughts....

I'm gonna share the joy people...

Toll House Pie

2 eggs
1/2 cup all-purpose flour
1/2 cup sugar
1/2 cup firmly packed brown sugar
1 cup butter, melted and cooled to room temperature
1 cup (6 oz.) Nestle' Toll House semi-sweet morsels
1 9-inch unbaked pie shell (deep dish)
Whipped cream or Ice cream optional (but key)

Preheat oven to 325*F. In large bowl, beat eggs until foamy. Add flour, sugar and brown sugar, beat until well blended. Blend in melted butter. Stir in melted butter. Stir in Nestle' Toll House semi-sweet chocolate chips. Pour into pie shell. Bake at 325* for 1 hour. Serve warm with whipped cream or ice cream if desired.

Now if you never want to make this recipe and instead, rely totally on me to make this for you, once or twice a year.... well a girl needs to feel needed.

Suffice it to say, we had a fabulous time. You know we could always pool our resources and buy a ten acre compound out Northwest of town. Everybody should be easily movable, except maybe Danny, but I figure they probably pay you ridiculous money up there and would probably be happy to offer you an early retirement to make you go away. Plus, we have hospitals down here and I hear the food is Crap! And Carrie, they have schools here in Texas and a few kids still go there, at least that's what I've heard, and we're tropical. Totally tropical. Then I can implement my plan to homeschool my children and turn them into a new musical group ala The Hansons. We'll tour around the State Fair Circut, the boys will be on the front every Teen Magazine and we'll get STINKIN RICH! Of course we always have the Lotto to fall back on.

Seriously. Think about it. We could get started, say, first of the year. Like a New Year's Resolution.

A Holiday Meme

A meme courtesy of Yerdoingitwrong.

• 1. Egg Nog or Hot Chocolate? Hot Chocolate. Duh! But I like to have a sip of egg nog every year, cause Mom always had some around at Christmas.
• 2. Does Santa wrap presents or just sit them under the tree? Just sittin'.
• 3. Colored lights on tree/house or white? I like them both, Charlie likes colored, we do both. We put them on the house once, they may still be there .
• 4. Do you hang mistletoe? I look for the real stuff every year, I need an excuse for my kids to have to kiss me more.
• 5. When do you put your decorations up? Whenever I feel like it! Gosh!
• 6. What is your favorite holiday dish (excluding dessert)? My Dad's sausage dressing.
• 7. Favorite Holiday memory as a child: I asked for a rabbit fur coat one year and when we got up that morning (our Santa gifts weren't wrapped) I had a stuffed animal rabbit under the tree. After all the presents were opened, my Mom got out the hidden box from under the couch that had the coat in it.
• 8. How and When did you learn the truth about Santa? In third grade some kids were debating it in the recess line, so I went home and asked my Mom and she told me the truth. I ran off crying "You should have told me a lie!" (I'm sensitive like that..)
• 9. Do you open a gift on Christmas Eve? If the kids beg, I make sure I have new pajamas wrapped, so they look acceptable for x-mas pics.
• 10. How do you decorate your Christmas Tree? Mostly with decorations the kids made every year in Mother's day out and some old popsicle sticks we had when I was a kid. (I think I need some new ornaments.)
• 11. Snow! Love it or Dread it? Love it, but then again, I live in Houston and I don't have to drive in it anymore.
• 12. Can you ice skate? No. I used to be afraid of embarrassment, now I'm afraid of gravity.
• 13. Do you remember your favorite gift? When I was a kid, it was a rabbit fur coat. The first year Charlie and I were together he suprised me with a ski-trip. The best gift I ever got!
• 14. What's the most important thing about the Holidays for you? All of it, being with the family, reminding the kids what Christmas is really about, driving around looking at Christmas lights......
• 15. What is your favorite Holiday Dessert? Chocolate Pie, Duh!
• 16. What is your favorite holiday tradition? Christmas Cards.
• 17. What tops your tree? We have a star and an angel, John always wants the angel.
• 18. Which do you prefer giving or Receiving? Giving, but I never say no to a gift!
• 19. What is your favorite Christmas Song? All of them, and I like to sing them loudly like, "HARK THE HEARALD ANGELS SING, GLORY TO THE NEW BORN KING!"

Thankful for...

a quiet house and perhaps a chick flick while all my houseguests and family are at my brother-in-laws having an old fashioned sing along.

Why am I here, and not there?

Can't sing. Oh, I can carry a tune, I just can't unload it. I'm the only person I know who has small children that will not allow me to sing them a lullabye. I was singing "Life is a Highway" yesterday and Ace said "NO! That's not your song. It's the MOOvie's."

Oh well. The little people are getting a good night's sleep and so will I! Tomorrow we're doing a gag gift exchange since we won't all be together at Christmas. And the food this week?

I'm so thankful for good food...and good company!

Deep Thoughts

by Jack Handy

I mean, Peach

"I AM! I'm thinking so hard I can't get all my thinks out!"

"Do you know what shoot means? It means darn it."

What are the Odds?

The blue Wednesday folder made a sickening thud as I flung it onto the counter. I slowly flipped back through the mounting evidence. Seventy-six "Check your work", seventy, seventy, sixty-eight, there was a spattering of eighties tucked in between the c's and d's but clearly, they were the exception. Before I could open my mouth, he whined "She wrote all over my folder because of one paper!".

The day for a conference had finally arrived. "Melee', you're so grounded!"
"I KNOW! I KNOW! From what?"
"Everything..."
"Sigh."

As I pulled my tiny person chair up to the knee high table across from teacher, she asked "How's my big boy doing? What grade is he in now?"

What was I going to say? That I'd spent the previous evening sitting on top of him as I oversaw the first half of the Time Capsule assignment that he'd had two months to work on, but instead had waited until two days before the due date to get started? That, had I not had to go in and talk to his teacher about another unrelated item, I wouldn't have even known the project was due?

"He's fine. I still have to stay on top of him. But I'm not used to having to stay on top of this one!"

After a short lecture on the importance of good writing skills and discovering several important items that Melee' had conveniently forgotten to fill me in on, I left the building thinking that I'm probably not writing at a fourth grade level. The planning, the rough draft, the revision, the editing, the rich wording were all more work than I wanted to do. And I like writing. For the last month he was supposed to have been writing in a daily journal at home on nights when he doesn't have composition work. As far as I knew, he never had composition homework and I'd never heard of this home journal. To which he responded, "Well, I didn't have one."
"Well, how can I get you one, if you don't tell me you need one?"

Aye, there's the rub...

I've got one who wouldn't open his mouth in class if his life depended on it, but can't get his work done because his brain is never in the same room with him. And I've got another one who can't get his work done because he can't keep his mouth shut.

Third times the charm, right? My money's on the girl.

Mommy's Tired

Am I the only person that thinks that harness outfit that Joan Crawford used to keep her kids in bed, is a great idea?

To all who are coming at Thanksgiving, bring an extra bag. I might be giving away a forty-five pound party favor.

I could really use a nap.

The Parakeet Takes a Dive

Well, it happened. Last Sunday afternoon at about 3:25 my Faith Formation teacher called and said "I'm so sorry, but I'm not going to be able to make it tonight. Do you think you can handle the class?"

"Sure!" I said. "No problem!" I said. "Don't even worry about it, just get to feeling better."

I hung up the phone, turned to Peach and said "We're done shopping honey, gotta hurry home, Momma's gotta study."

"Why?" she asked.

"Momma's gotta be the teacher tonight."

"Not the teacher-helper?"

Worried? What me worry? Nah! Facing between fourteen and eighteen semi-pro teenagers whose parents have forced them to come to Faith Formation on a Sunday evening when they could be home chatting on their cell phones?

"Honey, grab two of those Jumbo bags of M & M's. No the GREAT big ones! That's a good girl."

Got home to find that I had forgotten to get my lesson plan for this week's lesson from Elizabeth before I left class last week. Called Marie, made arrangements to be there 45 minutes early so I could prepare myself for class.

The rest of the evening?

Crickets chirping......

Three more things I should have said to the Steam-Express guy...

"Oh! Be careful of the dog in the back yard, she bites. "

"I know, she seems really friendly, what with the licking and tail wagging, but seriously, if you try to open the gate latch, she'll take your arm off at the shoulder."

"Em-hm. We're still paying off a settlement with the meter-reader, so I'll have to pass on the pre-treat."

A Letter From Home

Dear Charlie,

I have a confession to make. The guy from Steam Clean came Monday and cleaned my ductwork, if you know what I mean. I've made a mistake, and I wish it didn't have to be this way. I mean, I'm not totally naive. I knew when I called that there was no way I was going to get out of the deal for $89.99, coupon or not. There was mold on the air vents, we both knew it was going to be bad, but I thought I could control myself. I thought, I'll pay a couple a hundred extra for the heavy duty sanitizer and have three rooms of carpet cleaned for "free". And when he said it was just $66.00 extra to pretreat it... well there was four years of chocolate and vomit on those carpets for god's sake! We have company coming for Thanksgiving, and the cleaning itself was free...right? The next thing I know I'm having every room in the house done, I've paid extra for scotch guard and he's got me standing at the kitchen sink cleaning my own vent covers to "save" myself $150 and he's telling me "You better show your apprectiation!" and showing me where I can add a tip.

Couldn't I just tell people you'll beat me if I say yes? It would be so much easier if I could say "Pretreat? Oh...I don't think so... (pregnant pause) They say his first wife had her carpets pretreated once. Nobody ever heard from her again. His family says she's living in Mexico....but...no I think I better not have it pretreated." Then when he starts asking questions like "So, what does your husband do? What time does he get home?" I could say "Oh, it's fight night. He usually makes it to one of the final rounds, he'll be home pretty late." and then "No, no...not boxing. Cage fights." That would save me from rearranging all three cars every night so that it looks like we're all home. I haven't slept for two nights. By the time you get home, the dog will be sleeping in your spot. Could you just, like, work from home and never go anywhere again for the rest of your life? That would sure take the pressure off.

Love you babe!

p.s. Did I mention the kids broke the window that you and your brother replaced last Thanksgiving?

Hurry home!

PPS. Melee' hit a home run tonight. You'll need two sheets of glass this year.