How's This for a Reality Show?

Monday morning I get up with a plan. Dentist appointment for me at 10:00. My sister-in-law is going to meet me at the Mother's Day Out at 9:30 so she can watch Ace for me. That was the plan.

This is the reality.

We get up at 7:00 and get ready for our Walkies on DVD, the boys trickle down by 15 or 20 after and miss the first half mile. Melee' sits down and has his "healthy" breakfast of a Cookies and Cream Quaker Chewy Granola bar (key words Granola Bar) and a light Vanilla Yogurt. I'm putting together John and Peaches lunches, Zoey comes in with her mom and we visit for a minute, firm up plans for the dentist and Zoey and Melee' take off on their bikes for school. Zoey's mom heads home for a shower and I begin hounding John to hurry and comb his hair and brush his teeth. Meanwhile, I start slicing potatoes for the Au Gratin potatoes I'm taking over to their house for Monday night football.

At 8:25 Melee' calls.
"Mom, um, I was sitting in the cafeteria and someone spilled their milk and cereal all over me and I need some new clothes."
"Uh. ** Well. ** Um. Okay, I've got to get Peach and Ace dressed and I 'll be there in about ten minutes."
I get John out to the bus at 8:27 and haul upstairs to cloth and shoe the Littles. I'll have to take them into the building so Peach's hair will have to be dealt with. I get the casserole in the oven, kids dressed, jump in the car and by the time I get around the corner to the school, it occurs to me that Melee' is fibbing. The only way he could have gotten milk and cereal dumped all over him, is if he was eating a second breakfast and spilled it on himself. Do a changeout of clothes, with a small lecture on telling the truth then zip back home to get Peach ready for school.

Do I have any makeup on? Have I brushed my teeth? Oh yeah. Run upstairs, look in the mirror and do damage control. My S-I-L calls and says, why don't I just come on over and then you won't have to run Ace back to the house. "Great!" Put on some mascara, run downstairs and gather Peaches bags. By the time she and I get to Mother's Day Out it's 9:45, fifteen minutes late. I jump back in the car and start to leave the parking lot when S-I-L calls my cell phone and says "Were you expecting the exterminator today?" "Shit! Yes, I'll swing by and leave you a check, Sorry!" Write the check while swinging my 3 ton vehicle around stop signs in the neighborhood and practically fling the check out the window at her as I pass. I look down at my watch and realize there is no way I'm gonna make my appointment on time, so at the next stop light I dig through my purse, find the office number and call to tell them I'm running a little late. "What was your name again?" "Geraldine Fleiss, with an F." "Oh, well honey, your not supposed to be here till next Monday."